Those Damn Lucky Slaves

I don't know, many.

I don't know where to even begin.

As soon as I open my mouth, I sound like I'm just launching into another hyper-partisan rant.

But, I mean, really?

So far, I don't have much of anything bad to say about Mitt Romney. I certainly wouldn't want him to be my President, but as far as Presidents that I don't agree with go, I don't think he'd be an especially bad one.

But beyond that, I mean, come on, holy shit. Are you paying attention to this stuff?

Does it bother you that Rick Perry and Herman Cain both claim that God told them to run? Me, I'm getting a little tired of the "God told me" stuff. We just got out of eight years of that. I have to assume that God's just screwing with them, that this is just meant to be funny.

The question arises: did God tell Herman to grab his coworker's crotch? And if God really wants Rick Perry in office, why doesn't he give him any debate tips? I mean, Moses was a bad public speaker, so God gave him Aaron to do the talking, right? So, why nothing for poor Rick Perry?

Which brings me to items two and three: I mean, come on, really, do we need another inarticulate buffoon (and I say that with as much love as possible) representing this nation? And isn't there any "ick" factor at all in the Cain stuff, here? I mean, shouldn't this stuff be turning people off a little? Media bias, liberals in the media, blah, blah, blah... except that the liberal media didn't make those "please be quiet about this" payments way back when. It's a real, true story, not purely a media fantasy.

And really... I mean, come on... "if you're poor, it's your own fault." In an economy that's just been falling apart, with jobs fleeing the country, businesses shutting down, lay offs, foreclosures, etc, etc, etc, is "it's your own fault" really the message we want from a potential leader of this country? I mean, first, it's not really factual-- there are currently 4.3 job seekers for every job opening, so the reality is, if every single person not working right now was super motivated, busted his or her ass, did everything possible to achieve the dream, 75% of that group would still be unemployed. "It's your own fault" doesn't quite address the realities here. Beyond that, though, beyond just the factual stuff... calling people in need a bunch of lazy scumbags doesn't strike me as particularly helpful or inspiring leadership. Again, I had eight years of a President who quite obviously didn't like a large portion of the people he was elected to represent. We don't need that again to the nth power (W. at least tried to fake it).

Buffoonery, mean spiritedness, sexual predation, inarticulate muttering, chest thumping. That seems to sum up the GOP these days. That's kind of sad.

But no. It doesn't sum it up. I'm leaving some things out.

I'm leaving out "we hate them gay people."

I guess that pretty much goes without saying. "We hate us some fags" is the party line again.

But it gets better (worse? sadder? more pathetic? hilarious?).

Grover Norquist's tax pledge irks me. I'm not big on elected representatives making "pledges" to third parties (well, at least not pledges that could conflict with the job responsibilities, that tie their hands in office).

But that pledge pales to this one.

Read this morning about the Family Leader pledge.

This is the pledge that Rick Perry just signed, full of all the standard "one man/one woman," "I hate them queers," "I won't cheat on my wife" stuff. (That last point's actually a good one... but did he really need a pledge other than his wedding vows to tell him that?)

The pledge Rick Perry signed was sort of kind of "watered down." It was just a bunch of anti-gay rhetoric from what I understand.

Rick Santorum (the word "santorum" makes me laugh every damn time I hear it) and Michele Bachman (nothing about that psychopath makes me laugh) signed an earlier version of it.

The earlier version of the pledged also stated that black kids had it nice under slavery.

Those damn lucky negroes, living high on the hog. No job, no bills. Just pick a little cotton, wile away the hours. They had it way, waaaay better than kids today.

You know what?

Disqualified.

Rick Santorum and Michele Bachman should be disqualified.

And fully ashamed of themselves.